Recently several blogs caught my attention asking people what they have given up for their writing dream. I was surprised by some of the things people have sacrificed for their writing. Other things didn’t surprise me at all. Some people have given up housekeeping, cooking meals for their families, and their lunch hour at work. Some people have given up jobs, moving out of their parent’s house, other dreams, money, a social life, but the majority of people commenting said they have given up a precious commodity – sleep.
I asked myself how I would answer this question. One important thing popped into my head right away. I was giving up time with my husband, children and grandchildren. If writing were my profession it would be easy for me to justify spending time away from my family during work hours. Since it’s not and I work a full time job I have the ‘guilt’ of taking more time for myself during what free time I have. Instead of spending some of my free time being a wife, mother and grandmother I spend it writing. It is easy for me to get into my routine of going to work, coming home, preparing dinner then sitting down to write before bed. Before I know it the weekend is here and I haven’t seen much of my grandchildren or my children.
Now the nice weather is here there is always something to do outside so I have added responsibilities of yard work, tending my flowers and garden. I can’t come home and snuggle up in a blanket and sit down at my computer for the evening because ‘it’s too cold to go outside.”
I could dwell on how much I am missing and make myself miserable. I could feel guilty for what free time I spend writing. Or I could give up my dream and give in to my own pressure to do my best to be available when everyone needed me. I could make sure and take the time to clean my house so when I had company it was spotless. I could spend my time cooking nice meals for my family instead of picking up take out or driving through the closest fast food restaurant. I could spend my spare time on useless choirs or I could write.
What I have discovered is I have found my passion. I have made wonderful friends by belonging to groups of people who share the same dream I do which is to be a published author. If I didn’t make time for myself to write, to express myself on paper and to share my dream with other writers I would feel there was something missing in my life. I would be incomplete. To me that would be a bigger loss than the extra time I could give my family. I have learned in my many years of life that if I give to myself and I am happy with me I have more to give to my family. Also what I give them is a happier wife, mother and grandmother. The time I do share with them is more meaningful and appreciated.
When you find your passion and are trying to decide how to make your dream come true remember, don’t give up. Don’t let the world and the people in it dictate how you accomplish your dream. Listen to your heart and your head.
Happy 4th Birthday to my grandson Kael Alexander. Grandma loves you more than you know.